Saturday, July 17, 2010

Why Regret ?

Should I regret about something ? , this question I ask several times to myself but most of the times I manage it to convince myself that man you are right , it's your life, you can do anything whatever you want, you can change your habits as per your surrounding , eveybody does that why don't you ? You are not an ethics god, you are just a simple person. Nothing is eternal to you. But at the end it says don't harm anyone if that is fine you can do anything what you want.

Lots of question come in my mind hitting like the bullets. I always try to shield myself at any cost. Today I have lost that shield. I am not in a position to convince myself that why shouldn't I regret. Experiment with truth which everyone wants to do in their life din't convince me today. I was asking me a question why did you experiment with those things which you know that is not good for you, you so called ethics doesn't match with it. But today I deeply carried away by my half consicious foolish mind. The principles for which i always used to fight, I myself have broken that. I am really ashamed of myself. I am in very rudderless situation now. Nothing can convince me right now. I have a deep remorse about my actions today. I am not blaming anyone for this. Now at this age I know what is good what is bad ? Why do we mostly learn after doing mistakes ? Aren't such abberations avoidable?

Today the only thing which giving me bit sense of relief is my relationships which i have in form of parents, friends and close relatives. I know they won't abandon me for my mistakes. They might tease me , they might scold me but they finally they understand me.

Pardon me.

I have a question why do we always try to expand our limits according to our wish, choice and preference without thinking of repurcussions. I don't have a answer for it, you might help me in finding that.

7 comments:

Abhinav said...

sometimes i feel i have also done the same but i feel that if there is something which u feel is correct stand for it. I have always respected u for somethings i feel u must continue doing that u are good.

Anuj said...

But, what did you do, that makes you feel like that ?

Gaurav Kumar Jain said...

@chola: will tell you when i meet u..
@bachcha: you might not respect me after u listen what happened..

Aniket said...

Kya kar diya?

bhale said...

dont be so harsh on yourself man

Moli said...

we all want to stand by our principles though out our life and know that we are not a hypocrite. But you know there is something called change, there is something called flexibility ... so with time if your principles change, do not be so hard on yourself ... if it's a good change, well good for you. Otherwise contemplate and try not to repeat the mistake. Nothing is wrong till you decide it is.
Forgive yourself, nothing is tougher in life than to do that

Gaurav Kumar Jain said...

@moli and bhale: Yeah finally i have come out of that.. what moli and bachcha said is true. I won't repeat.